Self Proclaimed Genius
This question is for myself: Am I really a SELF proclaimed genius?
What does this classification even mean to me?
Just a moment ago, I was privileged enough to regain control of my blog . . . genius. Humorous romantic of the term genius, is more like it. The romantic, ask any girl who has received those love letters in the form poems. Been crushed by the sheer number of them, or just a few, she'll know how to define this for you.
So, as I recover my blog and read about a a small company which produced an amazing balancing bipedal robot named Dexter (after one of my favorite sci geniuses of all time) I think to myself about how I think about the people who create these GREAT, AMAZING, creations the media would rant about and abstract into the:
"they have created a [superlative] robot, [fluff]"
in their silly overly dramatic voices, but I should save my rant for the media for a seperate post. After all, patience will pay off, b/c it will receive (I hate to promise b/c I might suddenly lose all interest in blogging; I usually blog in sprees || spurts).
I posses this sense of idealism in my head, which is made, I suspect of a conglomerate of such media propaganda, self-guilt, from not achieving my overly perfectionist goals, lies, malformed opinions, and basically anything which is irrational and decided upon by my emotions, but has indubitably stuck in my psyche over the years. So thus being stuck, information such as this plays a suppressive role during times when I vigorously rationalize the world around, and about myself. It causes me to analyze why sound ideas during non-emotional phases do not elegantly connect with other ideas, which I do not at the time know to be emotional. So thus I have to rationalize that they are false. In other words 'unlearn" something ( perhaps this is why unlearning can be a very strenuous and difficult process; hmm another post any1? )
How do I come and believe in ideas such as: "I cannot learn everything" when I judge that knowing everything consists of knowing ideas that people such as the ones mentioned at the linked site might know. In practice I might not know most of what they do. But, in practice, if they compare themselves similarly to the world they would find that they ARE the top. Silly ( perhaps this is how overly conceited people become pompous assholes who are good at what they do; and victims of hate because their personality is such ). How would these people ever have a need or motivation (well I admit they could, but this IS a rhetorical question not open to analysis are dismemberment : ) )
Also I come across the notion that my grandiose ideological ideas are accomplished but by a mere number of skilled people as those linked above. This is rather unorthodox as far as my views are concerned. Rather shattering shouldn't it be? So it IS possible to become my ideologies !!!
Well, not really. Because I would be becoming a REAL person not my ideology, which those real peole cannot ever be. This is a difficult concept to grasp. If you do grasp it: congrats. But if you don't: give yourself a couple of years, do something silly, crazy, something opposite to which you think you are 100% sure of, something which will FORCE you by means of circumstance, surroundings to take action in your new environment. Don't just sit and think. Although I'm EXTREMELY hypocritical in offering such advice.
My anxieties are much eased by the idea that my previous thoughts about how intelligent and full of potential I really am are true. Now if you interpret this last sentence to mean I'm a pompous bastard, then too bad for you, Perhaps, had you lived in my shoes as I have, until now, there could be an understanding reached that would open eyes to reveal that is is an EXTREMELY motivational statement to me in the vicious nastiness of current life, or life in general as it is always HARD; people say this consistently over time. But your opinions are great; keep them; and grow from a true understanding of their meaning with time. Later you might decide to revise, or further strengthen them based on life experience.
This topic has not been very focused on the point which I'm trying to explain. I usually try to be, but alas, not today. Maybe I'll try again some other day. I think it's partially b/c I'm having too much fun typing ultra fast and not really thinking about how to structure my thoughts so much as I normally would. Plus the fact that I cannot keep a thought consistent without ranting on it's details EVERY time as I'm currently doing (so this is why they say people w/ Generalized Anxiety Disorder blow up (seems like fluff, and superlative in brackets are HTML tags in blogger ) small tasks into really big ones. ).
Summary:
But basically, I got a real feeling that inventions I read about are created by real people with real knowledge, not some fictitious people in my head. This makes me feel sounds better
What does this classification even mean to me?
Just a moment ago, I was privileged enough to regain control of my blog . . . genius. Humorous romantic of the term genius, is more like it. The romantic, ask any girl who has received those love letters in the form poems. Been crushed by the sheer number of them, or just a few, she'll know how to define this for you.
So, as I recover my blog and read about a a small company which produced an amazing balancing bipedal robot named Dexter (after one of my favorite sci geniuses of all time) I think to myself about how I think about the people who create these GREAT, AMAZING, creations the media would rant about and abstract into the:
"they have created a [superlative] robot, [fluff]"
in their silly overly dramatic voices, but I should save my rant for the media for a seperate post. After all, patience will pay off, b/c it will receive (I hate to promise b/c I might suddenly lose all interest in blogging; I usually blog in sprees || spurts).
I posses this sense of idealism in my head, which is made, I suspect of a conglomerate of such media propaganda, self-guilt, from not achieving my overly perfectionist goals, lies, malformed opinions, and basically anything which is irrational and decided upon by my emotions, but has indubitably stuck in my psyche over the years. So thus being stuck, information such as this plays a suppressive role during times when I vigorously rationalize the world around, and about myself. It causes me to analyze why sound ideas during non-emotional phases do not elegantly connect with other ideas, which I do not at the time know to be emotional. So thus I have to rationalize that they are false. In other words 'unlearn" something ( perhaps this is why unlearning can be a very strenuous and difficult process; hmm another post any1? )
How do I come and believe in ideas such as: "I cannot learn everything" when I judge that knowing everything consists of knowing ideas that people such as the ones mentioned at the linked site might know. In practice I might not know most of what they do. But, in practice, if they compare themselves similarly to the world they would find that they ARE the top. Silly ( perhaps this is how overly conceited people become pompous assholes who are good at what they do; and victims of hate because their personality is such ). How would these people ever have a need or motivation (well I admit they could, but this IS a rhetorical question not open to analysis are dismemberment : ) )
Also I come across the notion that my grandiose ideological ideas are accomplished but by a mere number of skilled people as those linked above. This is rather unorthodox as far as my views are concerned. Rather shattering shouldn't it be? So it IS possible to become my ideologies !!!
Well, not really. Because I would be becoming a REAL person not my ideology, which those real peole cannot ever be. This is a difficult concept to grasp. If you do grasp it: congrats. But if you don't: give yourself a couple of years, do something silly, crazy, something opposite to which you think you are 100% sure of, something which will FORCE you by means of circumstance, surroundings to take action in your new environment. Don't just sit and think. Although I'm EXTREMELY hypocritical in offering such advice.
My anxieties are much eased by the idea that my previous thoughts about how intelligent and full of potential I really am are true. Now if you interpret this last sentence to mean I'm a pompous bastard, then too bad for you, Perhaps, had you lived in my shoes as I have, until now, there could be an understanding reached that would open eyes to reveal that is is an EXTREMELY motivational statement to me in the vicious nastiness of current life, or life in general as it is always HARD; people say this consistently over time. But your opinions are great; keep them; and grow from a true understanding of their meaning with time. Later you might decide to revise, or further strengthen them based on life experience.
This topic has not been very focused on the point which I'm trying to explain. I usually try to be, but alas, not today. Maybe I'll try again some other day. I think it's partially b/c I'm having too much fun typing ultra fast and not really thinking about how to structure my thoughts so much as I normally would. Plus the fact that I cannot keep a thought consistent without ranting on it's details EVERY time as I'm currently doing (so this is why they say people w/ Generalized Anxiety Disorder blow up (seems like fluff, and superlative in brackets are HTML tags in blogger ) small tasks into really big ones. ).
Summary:
But basically, I got a real feeling that inventions I read about are created by real people with real knowledge, not some fictitious people in my head. This makes me feel sounds better
posted by rivanov at
9:24 PM
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